Rendezvous by DSH Perfumes

There are two ways that I can explain Rendezvous to you.

If you are in San Francisco… it’s like having sex with your dirty hipster boyfriend in the spring which is turning into summer on a Saturday night after being with him Friday night, and you’ve been dancing and partying and drinking and he’s been smoking both nights and maybe there were drugs involved. Sunday morning you both skeeze out of bed without a shower and lurch up to Dolores Park because it’s sunny and hot like a jewel, and you lie around with each others juices making your crotches smell Funky As Shit. Nasty like pussies and dicks and wetness that has dried and redried and you smell it every time you pull your pants down to use the toilet. And you’re lying in the sweet damp green grass because the sun feels so good on top of the cold squishiness and you are no good for anything else that day except dirty hair and baguettes and cheese and beer and your scungy face in oversized sunglasses that is getting a mild sunburn but oh well because you just got laid.

If you are not in San Francisco…

I like Rendezvous for what it is, but because of what it is, it is too redolent of sex juices and a looong funk, even for me. I tried it out and I was like “Oh yea, I’m going to be so super-cool and hipster, and wear my pre-made hipster funk out to dinner with my boyfriend on date night!” And then I came home and it was utterly overwhelming and I felt dirty and gross like I just had sex with someone I shouldn’t have who smokes and drinks and is unhealthy, and that I stayed too long the next day without a proper breakfast or a shower, and I should have left the night before while he was sleeping, and so I crawled home on the train and into bed with Netflix.

It was just a little much.

Like my life 5 years ago.

I took a shower to wash the hipster funk offa me and I haven’t looked back. I guess I just like smelling pretty a little more than I like smelling nasty.

Available at Tigerlily Perfumery, which you should totally support if you’re in San Francisco because they’re awesome, and on Ms. Spencer Hurwitz’s own website.

And a special P.S. to Ms. Spencer Hurwitz, if you’re reading: your perfumes in EdP format really deserve a packaging upgrade – the atomizer, at the very least, is agonizing. If I’m spraying this juice, or any other of your fine, fine creations, I want to feel luxurious! Like that price tag is giving me The Full Experience, if you know what I mean. Especially with this dirty nasty piece.

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